This I do not really like talking about, it was they worst days of my life. So, long story short. I am admitted to hospital they scan and there is no baby. My uterus is filled with blood and then I heard the dreaded word – ectopic. I am booked for surgery the next day where it is discovered that Baby A had burst my fallopian tube and Baby B (not twins) still attached to the opposite ovary. All they could tell me was that baby B was further along and they don’t know how long it has been there.
So basically they removed both fallopian tubes and wished me well with IVF as my only option.
I cannot begin to explain the pain, hurt and difficulty I had mourning the loss of my natural fertility. I couldn’t deal. I packed up and ran away overseas for a year. Drank a little too much, partied a little too hard and then dealt with it.
I still miss my babies even though I never met them and my heart still hurts when I think about them but atleast now I smile and I am ok.